I am creating this blog for anyone who has had serious heart break. And serious heart break at the hands of someone who didn't deserve them. It will chronicle 2.5 years. Mine was at the hands of someone I loved with all my heart and soul. Someone I fell in love with the minute we saw each other, someone I knew I would marry and probably love forever.  Some one who said I was the love of his life, who convinced me he had been waiting for me forever. Someone who ended up taking all my self worth and all my self esteem to make himself feel better about his own past and his own self esteem/self worth issues. What I didn't know was that he wasn't who he appeared, he had a mental illness, he was a sociopath in every sense of the word, I discovered later. I dedicate my story, this blog… and this is my story, nobody else, of love, deceit,  and severe pain that my heart may never truly get over and  trying to finally heal, to my best friend Megan... and my son, whom I would not leave without a mother, I will be there when he graduates college, gets married and becomes a parent.  I can honestly say and I have told Megan this several times, I would most likely not be here if it weren't for her and my niece who kept me busy, and her support every day through this, she never left  my side, she stayed overnight with me several times when I didn't think in my own head I would make it through the night. I spent the first few months of that summer of 2012 apart from this man that was my Prince Charming and I wanted to die… anything I could do to stay positive, stay strong, stay alive, even though there were days I didn't want to be here. I'm sure she doesn't realize the true impact it had on me, but the days when I didn't feel I wanted to live she was there, in person, via texts or phone. I am sure my Mom was watching over me. Then it didn't matter, you only look at the pain and suffering your heart feels and nobody else can know your pain, they listen and advise but every night when you go to bed you are alone, crying and saddened beyond what anyone not going through this could understand.. This is my therapy, my self healing, My story starts here….